The avoiding game

Oranges and carrots can be said to be the best of friends in the world of fruits. They make a great glass of orange-carrot fruit juice when blended together in the juicer. But what if one day, the oranges were replaced by grapefruits (which appear to look exactly like oranges but taste bitter and sour)?

Crystal and Elaine were the best of friends whom hit off really well, just like oranges and carrots. However, after Crystal got appointed as the band major (one with the most authority in the band other than the teachers and instructors), Elaine could sense changes in Crystal. Crystal became aloof. In fact, when Elaine had something to discuss or share with Crystal, she always gave the nonchalant attitude. As time goes by, Elaine started to feel uncomfortable and became tongue-tied whenever she is with Crystal. Thus, whenever they had the opportunity to be with each other, Elaine will come up with an excuse to make a move in other to avoid the awkwardness between them. Furthermore, Elaine started to feel inferior, especially during band practices. This is mainly because she only holds a small position in the band whereas her used-to-be best friend was the band major.

This made life difficult for Elaine, but she did not make any effort to salvage this friendship. She chose to play the “avoiding” game. If you were her friends or in her shoes, what will you do? Play the “avoiding” game or make an effort to clarify the matter with Crystal?

The art that we need to master

“Oh, you’ve finished what you wanted to say?" “So?”
These two replies often appear (in fact they appeared too often) in my conversations with others. This clearly shows that the other party did not get what I wanted to convey. Not being able to put across my messages concisely and precisely is one BIG problem I face when communicating with others. Sometimes, even my mum says that I should sign up for some communication classes to improve on the way I express myself. I guess this is one of the reasons why developing effective communication skills are important to me.

The existence of communication has been there in our daily lives knowing and unknowingly. It is through this channel that we are able to put across our messages, love, anger or even frustrations. Having good communication skills like the proper gestures, facial expressions, or even silence at appropriate times not only prevents misunderstandings but also embarrassment. It also shows a form of respect to parties in the conversations or situations. Hence, it is no doubt important for us to develop effective communication skills. As we all know, being misunderstood or embarrassed is never a pleasant experience.

Effective communication is much needed at home, at work, between friends or in a relationship. It is not only an essential tool that prevents us from getting into conflicts between family members or friends. It is also an indispensable weapon that we need to arm ourselves with to protect us from losing our jobs. Thus, effective communication is an important art that we need to learn and master.